John Walt

What you were born for is on the other side of a fight.

The forgotten journey we all must go on.

Every major religion that I have studied incorporates some form of transformation journey. Rights of passage throughout history were built around transformation. So many of the stories that have shaped culture through movies and books center around the transformation of the main character. The hero’s journey is a narrative structure many of the most popular stories of all time are built on. Movies like Star Wars, Lord of the Rings and the Matrix follow the hero's journey. But also ancient stories like the Odyssey, Beowulf and The Epic of Gilgamesh. The most popular book of all time, The Bible, is a giant invitation to and instructions for our transformation journey.

It is fair to say that we as people are fascinated and captivated by transformation journeys. Why is that? I personally believe it is because we all have an innate desire to go on our own journey of transformation. The full picture of transformation has all but been lost in Western culture. Instead, marketers and technologists play on this desire for transformation by promising to help us become more, better, happier, thinner, smarter… The world offers transformation every day but it is just a shadow of the real transformation we are looking for.

Psychology says we must stop self-limiting thinking by retraining our brains. Stoicism says we must master self-control and overcome destructive emotions. Tribal rights of passage say the boy must die so a man can emerge. Jesus says we need to be reborn as new creations. Everywhere I look, I see the same pattern, humans want and need to be transformed.

What is a transformation journey?

Fundamentally a transformation journey is an intentional process of becoming a new person mentally and spiritually that leads to practical changes in how we live. It includes changing how we think, what we value, how we see ourselves and how we see others. It always leads to practical changes in how we live and relate to others, as well as, what we give our energy and attention to. It is foundationally spiritual because, without a relationship with God, it is impossible to believe we were created to be more than we are now. Ultimately God is the one who leads us through the journey every step of the way and brings us mentors to guide us and friends to support us.

I believe these transformation journeys should begin in the early teenage years as a part of the transition from child to adult. Since our culture doesn't make room for this kind of transformation, it seems that most people of all ages have not gone through it. Our Western approach to critical teenage years was created by the Industrial Revolution. Instead of seeing education as the formation of a person, we started to see education as the preparation for work. We took fathers out of the home to work and children out of the home to learn. Then we began rewarding productivity above all else. Industrialization laid the foundation for the golden age, where standards of living skyrocketed and the middle class expanded. Then a crazy thing began to happen, all this productivity created immense wealth and allowed us to forget our communal heritage as we embraced a more independent social structure fueled by mass consumerism and suburbanization. We ran this up the flag pole under the name of capitalism and the American dream. Unfortunately, when we embraced wealth accumulation and independence, we removed the primary driver of personal transformation… the need and desire to become someone capable of fulfilling our role in our community. We moved elders out of our homes into nursing homes where we don't have to watch them age and die. But in doing that we lost access to generational wisdom and a healthy relationship with our own mortality. Now we live in our own worlds inside huge temperature-controlled houses carrying endless entertainment in our pockets and building virtual social communities that validate our thinking and promise to make us feel good about ourselves. We are no longer aware of our interconnectedness and our wealth allows us to outsource our contribution to society to foreign labor, non-profits and government programs.

I am not glorifying ages past as “the good old days,” there is no question that each time period has faced incredible challenges and had significant social issues. The Industrial Revolution sparked a shift that has radically improved the standard of living for billions of people, but it started a snowball effect that has cost us our connection to each other and some timeless wisdom for living meaningful lives. We have radically improved so much in the last few centuries, but with industrialization, mass urbanization, globalization, technology, standardized education, ubiquitous entertainment, the internet and now AI, we have lost some foundational truths about what it means to be human. It is little wonder that we have forgotten God and no longer understand ourselves.

In tribal rights of passage, a mark of initiation was the shift from self-focus to group focus. The highest aim of a young man was to be the best he could at providing for and protecting the group. We have lost the realization of the social dependence that marked humanity for all of human history. Now most people idolize those who spend their lives self-absorbed in the pursuit of getting what they want when they want it. Influencers and celebrities who can do whatever, go wherever and buy anything they want are our heroes. Avoiding responsibility as long as possible is now a socially accepted perspective for a man in his twenties, thirties and forties. I would argue that even the concept of retirement is an illusion that leads many people to focus on self-gratification throughout their entire lives. As if not having to do anything every day is what makes you happy and fulfilled. The good news is that transformation can happen at any time in a person's life. It is never too late, we can always go back and get what we missed in our younger years.

How does it work?

There are a lot of transformation journeys out there, some are mostly good, and many are full of empty promises. I believe that a complete transformation journey requires several things to happen simultaneously.

Dying to the false self - Letting go of false identities, beliefs, desires and fears.
Renewing your mind - Reshaping our thought patterns to help us instead of hurting and hindering us.
Growing spiritually - Developing a real relationship with God where He speaks to you and guides your life.
Building your life on wisdom - Aligning how we live with how God’s creation is designed to function

Transformation journeys seem to follow a consistent pattern from everything I have learned in reading and hearing people's stories. Here are the basic stages of the journey:

Compelling Vision: A person gets a vision of who they can be that causes them to embark on a transformation journey.
Face Challenges: That person encounters challenges that require them to face fears and threaten their current sense of identity.
Mentor Guides: A mentor shows up to guide them through the challenges they face, showing them how to overcome fears and let go of their false identities.
New Identity: They discover who they really are and get a new sense of identity.
Positive Impact: Their transformation changes their actions and leads to a positive impact on their world and on the relationships around them.
Becoming the Guide: Over time, they become a mentor guiding others on similar journeys.

That is a rough outline of the stages of the transformation journey we all seem to need to go through. Most people never go on a journey like this or quit along the way for a few reasons. They don’t have a vision of who they can be and they are filled with fear of losing the security and comfort they have. If they get derailed from the journey, it is likely because we are unwilling to let their current sense of identity die. I think the reason more people don’t pursue a transformation journey is that they don’t know anything about transformation and why it is so important. We are one of the first cultures in human history not to have some sort of “rite of passage” process baked into our social structure.

We don't have a place for this transformation in our modern culture, and we don’t have communities full of mentors who can show us the way. Instead, we grow up to chase the vision of wealth, comfort, love and success that is the American dream. Then we wonder why we are unhappy, unfulfilled, and unsure of who we are.

It is critical that we understand what this journey is and make room for it. It is not simply salvation, as we understand it in Western Christianity. We can believe in God and never go on a transformation journey. I believe that many people are “invited” on this journey through life circumstances but most don't recognize what it is. When we experience failure, loss, fear, anxiety, and depression, there is an invitation in those challenges to embark on a transformation journey. If we don’t recognize the invitation, then it feels like being lost, abandoned, confused and hopeless.

The Bible talks about becoming a new creation and dying to yourself. The pictures of death and rebirth are very appropriate. Our false self has to die in order for the new self to be revealed and that is the invitation we receive throughout our life. People in their 20s and 30s will often experience deep depression and confusion and feel like everything they were motivated by is slipping away from them or no longer motivating. Instead of recognizing this as a necessary part of their transformation journey, they lose hope and often look for other ways to feel alive. I went through this myself, and thankfully, I had a mentor guiding me and helping me through these dark times.

I can now confidently say that I had no idea what I really wanted in my twenties, and I am so grateful I let those dreams and false identities go. When I talk to other people who have been on this journey for some time, they share similar sentiments. They had no idea what they really wanted until they let go of their false self and stepped deeper into their true self.

I have been surprised that there isn’t more writing and discussion about the structure of this kind of journey, the principles behind it and its effect on our lives. This journey has become my greatest passion. I will share more on the principles of transformation journeys in future notes.

- John Walt

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